Movie Madness
by Sirusi
Summary: Eragon and everybody is going to the movies. I thought this up at about 11 oclock last night. Pure crack.
1. Chapter 1

**AN:** Hi people! Hope you enjoy the randomness! Please R&R.

**Disclaimer:** Oh, by the way, I don't own Eragon :-( Or the Powerpuff Girls (thank God).

Eragon, Murtagh, Galbatorix, Nasuada, Arya, Orik's, Islanzadí, Roran, Saphira, Thorn, and Shruikan were preparing to go see the Eragon movie.

Needless to say, all was chaos.

"I call shotgun!" Arya screamed as soon as Islanzadí announced that she was driving.

"Eeeeew! I don't wanna sit in back with Orik! He pukes if he's not in front! Can someone's barf be, like, absorbed through your skin and make you fatter?" Nasuada asked.

"Uhh…no?"

"I wanna sit in front! I wanna sit with Islanzadí! I wanna sit with Izzy! I wanna sit with Izzy!" shrieked Galbatorix.

"DON'T CALL ME THAT IN PUBLIC!!!" 'Izzy' shouted back.

"Why shouldn't I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Huh? Hu –"

"Don't tempt me, _Galby_." 'Galby's eye twitched.

"Don't call me Galby!"

"Don't call me Izzy!"

"Don't call me Galby!"

"Don't call me Izzy!"

"Hey Arya," said Eragon as Galbatorix and Islanzadí continued to act like five-year-olds. "You know, in the movie theater it'll be dark…And we could sit in the back and –" He stopped short as Arya slapped him across the face. "Oh, come on! I was just saying –"

"Letta."

Eragon hovered slightly, unable to move as Arya walked off. "Wait! Come back…" _Saphira, how long do you think she's going to leave me here this time?_

_Little one, _she replied brusquely, sounding pissed off, _I am in the middle of some…__uhh__… important…business…with Thorn and Shruikan. Uhh…why don't you jus__t let me know when you get back? Yes…That should give us plenty of time to – wait, am I thinking out loud?_

_Yes._

_Crap. Well…uh…I must be going. Bye!_

Leaving her Rider completely puzzled, she flew off with the other two dragons.

Suddenly, something collided with the back of Eragon's head. "OWWW!"

"Sor_ry_," said Murtagh. "I was just trying to get your attention."

"Couldn't you have just tapped me on the shoulder?"

"Nah. Hitting you is more fun."

Eragon was about to make a witty retort when Islanzadí shouted above the melee, "SHUT UP! EVERYBODY IN THE MIN IVAN! THAT MEANS NOW, GALBY!"

At which arguments over the seating arrangements began anew, and Galby's eye twitched.

"He's my brother. I get to sit with Eragon."

"He's _my_ cousin. _I_ get to sit with Eragon."

"Brother!"

"Cousin!"

"Brother!"

"Cousin!"

"Brother!"

"Cousin!"

"BROTHER!"

"COUSIN!"

"Eragon! Who do you wanna sit with?" Roran and Murtagh demanded at the same instant.

"Uhh…I call shotgun?"

"IN!!!" Islanzadí thundered.

Everyone scurried into the minivan, fearing the elf's wrath. Everyone except Eragon, that is, who was still being held in place by Arya's spell.

"ERAGON! GET IN OR YOU'RE STAYING HOME!"

Arya smirked out the window.

In the end, the seating ended up like this: Nasuada rode shotgun with Islanzadí so they could talk about "girl stuff," whatever that was. Murtagh and Roran sat together behind the women and swapped embarrassing stories involving Eragon, egg nog, and the Powerpuff Girls, and Arya, Orik, and Galby sat in the back: Arya because she wanted to see Eragon floating there helplessly until they turned a corner, Orik because there was nowhere else to sit, and Galbatorix because he wanted to sulk about being called Galby and twitch.

"Islanzadí hates me!" he wailed. "Why can't I just DIE?!"

"That could easily be arranged," Arya muttered darkly. "Stupid truce-for-the-day-in-the-Ancient-Language…"

Meanwhile, Murtagh and Roran were discussing who was going to be the emo one. Perhaps "discussing" is putting it too mildly.

"Oh, sure, you're the son of Morzan and all that, but do you know what it's like being his cousin? First, he gets all the limelight, even though _I'm_ the one who led 300 people all the way from Carvahall to Surda!"

"Deal with it. At least you're not being forced to serve _Galby_ –" The king's head snapped up and his eye twitched. "– back there against your will."

"Eragon's _cousin_! If I was his brother, maybe someone would care, but no! I'm just his stupid, unimportant mother's brother's son!"

As the car rounded a corner, everyone was squashed against their neighbor. "I think I'm gonna be sick…" Orik mumbled.

Having finally agreed that Murtagh was going to be the emo one, Roran turned in his seat. "Here," he said, handing Orik an airsickness bag.

"Where did you get that? You've never been on an airplane."

"I…uh…borrowed it."

"Sure you did."

Suddenly the minivan stopped, lurching everyone forward, and Orik lost his lunch. All over Murtagh.

"Why you little –" he said, drawing Zar'roc.

"I am _not_ little!" the dwarf protested, bursting into tears. "I am vertically challenged, okay? I have a height deficiency! Why can't anyone ever be nice to me?!"

"Mom, why'd you stop the car?" Arya shouted to Islanzadí above the din.

"SHUT UP, EVERYONE!" the queen yelled. You could have heard a pin drop. "Now, what did you say, Arya?"

"Why'd you stop the car?"

"Oh, that! We almost forgot Eragon!"

"I thought you said he was staying home if he didn't get in the car," Arya replied, swearing silently.

"Well, we can't have him wandering off on his own, can we? And with Saphira off doing God knows what with Thorn and Shruikan, he might do something idiotic. He's not all that bright, you know," she said sweetly.

"Believe me…" Arya mumbled.

"But if I say we're going back to get Eragon, WE'RE GOING BACK TO GET ERAGON! GOT IT?"

Everyone nodded mutely.

So they went back to get Eragon. Arya reversed her spell, grumbling mutinously as she did so, and Eragon and Orik switched places. The dwarf went to sit up front between Islanzadí and Nasuada. Unfortunately (for Eragon) this meant that he was sitting with Galby and Arya.

**AN:** I hope that wasn't too horrible. All you have to do is push the purple button and let me know.


	2. Chapter 2

**AN:** Okay, so last we left off they had just picked up Eragon. I didn't feel like writing the car ride to the movies, so they're there already. Movie madness. Enjoy!

At the movies, there was a bit of a wait until the movie started. Never make Eragon bored. Bad things tend to happen. In this case, that thing involved Eragon flinging cheese everywhere. Don't ask me where he got cheese, cuz I don't know, and I don't think I want to.

Anyway, some cheese landed on Murtagh's head. Murtagh was still pissed off about the whole Orik-barfing-all-over-him incident and was looking for someone to take out his anger on. "Little brother, if you keep flinging cheese you are going to be so dead."

Eragon continued with the cheese-flinging fun. Murtagh had Zar'roc halfway out of its sheath when he remembered that he had sworn in the ancient language that he wouldn't hurt Eragon. At least for today. Unfortunately, Islanzadí saw him with his sword partly drawn.

"MURTAGH! WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT WEAPONS?"

Knowing what was good for him, Murtagh ran into the relative safety of the nearest movie. As he entered, something blew up on screen. Maybe he would watch this movie instead…He liked explosions. And fire. Fire was good.

Eragon came running after in after him. "Islanzadí's throwing a fit. It's actually quite fun to watch, because she knows she can't do anything about it. Come on." Then he saw his brother staring at the screen, completely transfixed. Eragon grabbed Murtagh by the arm and dragged him back into the lobby.

"I thought you got therapy to fix the whole pyromania thing."

Murtagh let out a snort.

"I assume it didn't work, then."

Murtagh nodded. "Let's see Islanzadí, then."

By the time she had worn herself out yelling at Murtagh all the irresponsibility of having a sword in a public place, the movie was about to start. Once they were seated, Galby started passing around an enormous bucket of popcorn that seemed to come out of nowhere.

Eragon ate the whole thing in under five minutes.

"I'm obsessed with fire, you're obsessed with popcorn. You tell me who's crazier."

"So I like popcorn…"

"When you finished Galby's – "

"Would everyone PLEASE stop calling me Galby?!!"

"No!" answered everyone simultaneously.

"Fine. See if I ever get you guys free popcorn again."

"Anyway," continued Murtagh, "when you just finished Galby's bucket of popcorn, you threatened everyone else in here with magic into giving you their popcorn. Now, who's more obsessed?"

Eragon glanced around nervously, shoving another handful of popcorn into his mouth. "What are you talking about? I am NOT obsessed with popcorn! Hey, I know what you're trying to do! You just want to steal my popcorn! MY POPCORN! MINE!!!"

"Oookaaay…"

And blah blah blah. Soon enough, the movie was over, and everybody felt that they had been cheated out of their hard-earned seven dollars.

"I am NOT blond!" Arya shrieked.

"Neither am I!" Eragon shouted.

"I looked so FAT!!!" screamed Nasuada.

"I thought I looked pretty good," said Murtagh. The others glared at him mutinously.

"I was BALD!" moaned Galbatorix.

"Hey, maybe now we should call him 'baldy' instead of 'Galby.'"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

"Ha! Galby is a baldy! Galby is a baldy!"

"WHY, GOD, WHY?"

**AN:** I'm sorry, but this is it for this story. I really must focus my attention on writing "Taize," my other story. I have never been a good multitasker. So again, sorry.


End file.
